Okay, here they are, the answers (?) to the first Yellow River Chronicles POP Quiz. Score 10 for any "correct" answer or answer that you thought was particularly astute on your part. Score another 10 for even taking the test and score another 10 for reading another Yellow River Chronicles. Any scores over...50, get a free beers when you come to visit the 'Hai!
The Questions with equally questioned Answers:
1)
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You are getting ready to go out for a night on the town in Shanghai with your main squeeze, Madame SlinkyFox. Your plans include drinks and dinner with a late night KTV stop. What do you choose to wear?
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a.
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Chairman Mao jacket, duuuhhhh.
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b.
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Every night is Halloween in Shanghai!
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c.
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Formal evening wear or pajamas
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And the answer is "B!" Either the circus is in town, or it is Saturday night in the 'Hai! You see lots of pajamas but rarely do you see formal evening wear. We are all just...relaxed here.
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2)
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Western fast food is extremely popular in Shanghai. However, one chain has a clear lead in market share, number of locations and hours of operation
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a.
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Mickey D’s
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b.
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Pizza Hut
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c.
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Kenny Roger’s Roasters
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d.
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KFC
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3)
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Hard to believe, but the most popular Western fast food joint in the 'Hai and the greater People's Republic, is KFC. This from the Harvard Business Review:
In the Harvard Business School case "Yum! China," professor David E. Bell and Agribusiness Program director and senior researcher Mary Shelman examine how Yum! Brands, the parent company of KFC and Pizza Hut, outperformed McDonald's and became the largest restaurant company in mainland China.
The evening goes well and you do indeed end up at a late night Karaoke place. You decide on a Chinese mainland classic and sing: | |
a.
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Yue liang daibiao wo do xin
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b.
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Hotel California
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c.
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You Shook Me All Night Long
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4)
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While it is true that Hotel California is played almost everywhere and is a very popular KTV song, the chinese classic "The moon is my heart" is chosen frequently, particularly with the older set.
You are waiting patiently at a busy street crossing. The light turns green and the pedestrian walkway sign now shows a glowing green walking person. You should: | |
a.
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Wet yourself in fear, turn, and flee homeward
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b.
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Proceed across the street in a dignified and orderly manner
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c.
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Move like iced lightning, dodge like a lawyer and watch your six like an assassin
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5)
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While our hearts tell us that the correct answer is "A", you can actually cross the street in the 'Hai by following the moves in answer "C". You will die if you follow "B".
There are many examples of duplicates, copies or fakes in most markets in Shanghai. What is the best way to determine if an item is fake? | |
a.
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If you have purchased it on the mainland of China, it is a fake
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b.
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Tourists are carrying shopping bags full of the same item
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c.
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A medium size will fit on a gopher
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d.
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There is an official seal of authenticity from a Chinese government regulatory body
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6)
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Ho HO! Yes, you can tell by all of the answers, but the BEST way is "D". Nothing says "FAKE!!!!" better than an official Chinese seal of authenticity.
Which of the following items will you NOT find as part of the standard outfit worn by American tourists visiting Shanghai for the first time: | |
a.
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Brand new, white running shoes
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b.
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An over sized t-shirt with the name of a plumbing company
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c.
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Four or five pairs of glasses and sunglasses, hung from various lanyards around the neck
A “Free Tibet” t-shirt
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This one is probably not even funny, but you will see no references of any kind to ....that place, here.
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7)
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While excellent and quite inexpensive, Chinese beer has a very low alcohol content. What is the labeled alcohol content of a bottle of Tsing Tao beer?
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a.
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6.7%
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b.
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Your horse has a kidney infection
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c.
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3.5%
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None, it’s a FAKE, dummy!
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8)
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You are visiting an eco-retreat in a remote Chinese province famous for its bamboo groves and mountain vistas. In the evening, as you approach the resort, what is the first thing you see?
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a.
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Blue mountains with epaulets of snow
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b.
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Gentle pines bowing like geishas to the wind
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c.
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Neon, baby!
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A group of hikers wearing “Hello Kitty” garb
The Chinese are very fond of neon. You find it in caves, on most buildings, on boats, and in nature preserves. You will see A, B and D, but the FIRST thing is usually the neon.
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9)
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The Chinese are fond of things that are re nao. A restaurant is good if it is re nao. A street market on a Sunday is best if it is re nao. A public park on the weekend will usually be re nao. Based on what you have learned from the YRC, what does the phrase mean, literally?
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a.
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Good value
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b.
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Hot and noisy
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c.
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Calm or serene
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d.
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Fake!
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Yes, there is a fake "Fake!" answer. Does that make it true, because two negatives make a positive? Maybe...score another 10 points just in case, but the answer is 'B", hot and noisy. When served in a Chinese restaurant, you usually get a deafening roar with the Gong Bao Chicken 宫保鸡丁. And yes, KFCs are re nao.
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10)
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An attraction in China (not Shanghai) was described as follows in the brochure. What was the attraction? When in rainy season, it seems a sensational giant dragon under moist vapor like to kiss you cool and comfortable.
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a.
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An ancient meditation cave
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b.
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A Ming Dynasty bath house
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c.
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The showers at a highway rest stop
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d.
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An underground waterfall
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A car wash
As much as we like the answer "C", the brochure described "D", an underground waterfall in southwestern China.
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11)
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Which of the following was not one of the Toxic Food items in the Chinese press this year?
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a.
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Pork that glows in the dark
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b.
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A condom in a container of yogurt
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c.
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Exploding watermelons
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d.
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Hydrochloric acid and formaldehyde used to produce counterfeit beer
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Cooking oil recovered from sewers
BONUS QUESTION!! Score 10 if you answered ANY of the above. They were all reported in the media. Pass the stinky tofu, darling!
That wraps this UP, rock stars! Thanks for reading the YRC and taking the test and we'll see you next week! We're icing down the beer right now...
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