First in the Series: Philistines in the Philippines for the Holidays!!

Hello and WELCOME BACK to the second YRC of the New Year.  As promised, this week we sail to the faire Philippines for some non-hazardous astronomical sightings and continued piercing observations into the human condition.  This is the first in a series of three on the amazing and remarkable Palawan region of the Philippines.

Mr. Perspective

We must start this missive with some "perspective" as Anton Ego used to say. Prior to our relocation to the People's Republic of China, the YRC staff believed that one of the many benefits of life on the Yellow River would be that perhaps, in a communist, non-theocratic nation, there would be minimal Winter Holiday commercialism. You know, Christmas decorations, dreary Celtic music and Evil Plastic Santas.  You have seen them of course, with their sinister glow, guarding yards and roofs around the world.

Ahem. In perspective, we were, well, deluded.  Mainland China has enthusiastically embraced the "holiday" of Christmas.   It currently produces nearly all of the christmas ornaments and plastic Santas in the world, so why not keep a few here?  So, hotel lobbys, shopping malls, convenience stores, hospitals, and massage parlors all gladly deck the Chinese halls with dozens of Santas, forests of Christmas trees and thousands of yards of blinking lights.  A veritable Chinese ARMY of Santas invades faire Shanghai and only leave when the Chinese New Year Decorations go up.  The Chinese just like holidays and bling, so the more, the merrier.  Sheng Dan Kuai Le to you, Comrade.

Every seat has a spectacular view 

Our escape from Chinese Christmas was to be to the Philippines, a large land of over 7,100 islands. This is the place where Magellan got whacked!  Gotta love it!  We would go far, far away, to tiny Apulit Island, in the Palawan region in southern Philippines.  There, we would escape the dual terror of Christmas in China and fall softly off the radar screen.  We would kayak and snorkel the reefs, hide out in a peaceful bungalow over the water, watch the stars at night, island hop during the day and escape the madness.   We are pleased to report that we accomplished, well, MOST of these.

Somewhere in Palawan, the Philippines

On to the journey!  While certain airlines give you a sense of luxury, some give you a sense of efficiency and grace, and others give you a sense of despair and pure terror.

The hop to Manila was uneventful except for the swarms of expat stoller people with mountains of luggage checking in for the flight to Manila.  The Philippines, as it turns out, is a popular location for expat families to spend the holidays.  So much for being trail blazers.  Sir, your child has micturated on my foot and do you really need to check a surfboard?

Heading South

While the flight to Manila was ...challenging, the wackiness picked up momentum when we headed out for Apulit after an overnight in Manila.  There is nothing more fun than flying in a small plane to an unpaved runway at an airport with no name.  They weigh you to make sure you can waddle on the plane, they weigh all of your luggage to make sure you have ONLY your ten kilos of luggage, including your carry-on and snacks, they load you on the plane like paratroopers and then you blast off over turquoise waters.

The Big Banca at Rest

Oh, to be a WWII fighter pilot in the Pacific.  Oh, to be getting ready to sink a freighter out of Shanghai loaded with Evil Plastic Santas.  But it was enough to be heading south flying low over hundreds of atolls and islands.


Roger that, Apulit Actual, this is Yankee Romeo Charlie, we are Oscar Mike. 

Once on the ground, we bounced to a banca. The banca ride was unique in the presence of outriggers and four heavy duty looking dudes in Raybans, heavy ammo belts and who shouldered mysterious cases carrying assault weapons.  Next stop, either an intense firefight, Mekong Delta style, or a tropical resort.  Tune in to next week's YRC to find out which, and thanks for tuning in!