Behind the Great Firewall Lurks the YRC...

Great to see you again!  We are going to start our second year of clear-sighted journalism with some news:  You may be excited to know that you are experiencing a rare privilege that 1.4 BILLION of the People's Republic citizens will never experience.  Yes, dear readers, you are reading the Yellow River Chronicles.

Are you sure the YRC is worth worrying about, Comrade General?

For reasons of public security and general journalistic fastidiousness, perhaps, the government of China maintains an active "Great Firewall" which censors many, many websites outside of China.  This according to Wikipedia:

China defends its right to censor the Internet that the country has the right to govern the internet according to its own rules inside its borders. The white paper, released in June 2010, called the internet “a crystallization of human wisdom.” But in the document the government lays out some of the reasons why its citizens cannot get access to all of that wisdom. It says it wants to curb the harmful effects of illegal information on state security, public interests and children. “Laws and regulations clearly prohibit the spread of information that contains content subverting state power, undermining national unity [or] infringing upon national honor and interests,” it says. In another section, China reaffirms its determination to govern the internet within its borders according to its own rules. "Within Chinese territory the internet is under the jurisdiction of Chinese sovereignty. The internet sovereignty of China should be respected and protected," it says. It adds that foreign individuals and firms can use the internet in China, but they must abide by the country's laws.

This protection includes large parts of the Cyberworld and your very own Yellow River Chronicles!  We ROCK!!  Here is result from an on-line app which allows you to check and see if a site is blocked.  

Note the line "Test results for theyellowriverchronicles.blogspot.com".  As you can see, the YRC is blocked in all of China, including Inner Mongolia.  However, the YRC is widely available in Mongolia!

For fun, you can go to the site (greatfirewallofchina.org) type in your favorite website and see if it is blocked.

"Squirrels sighted, Kilo Actual. Permission to engage!?!"

In fairness, the YRC is not singled out, as is the Red Lobster Restaurant site (truth!  List of sites blocked).  We are simply blocked because all Google-based blogs are blocked here.

So, YRC readership being as alert as a Jack Russell Terrier on methamphetamine, you then ask, "It that a squirrel?"  Ho ho ho.  Just kidding.  No, you ask, "how then is the YRC published each week." 

YRC Secret Communications Hub

Well, in the tradition of direct descendants of a long-time National Security Agency professional, we will simply....say nothing and look amused.  It is for your OWN protection, people.  

But, it does involve a communications satellite, AEHF Satellite (USA-214), some cups and twine and some really serious computer gear.  Um...subscription rates may be going up soon to pay for all this.

And next week in the YRC (if we are still here) we'll bring you up to date on what this all means on the other side of the world.

Hello and welcome to the 50th edition of the Yellow River Chronicles.  Yes, dear readers, we have been gathering around the virtual fireside to share anecdotes and other fabrications for about a week and a year here at the now venerable YRC.

First, thank you for coming along on a journey which has covered many parts of the Other Side of the World.  And what a journey it has been.  To continue in our perky and positive tradition, the Staff got together over a shaker or two of vodka Martinis and our travel journals to produce our first Top Ten List.

To get you in that Celebrating in the People's Republic of China mode, we have the trailer from the film "Beginning of the Great Revival," released when the Communist Party celebrated its 90th Anniversary.  This is to give you the flavor of how they celebrate anniversaries in the PR of C.

Epic anniversary video, yes?  Clearly, momentous things are in motion, as we speak.  We now have ambitions for something like that for the YRC, so check back frequently as we...um...pull it all together.  Now, back to our regularly scheduled column!

The YRC Top Ten Reasons to Live in Shanghai:

But, Dad!  My shoes don't match my.....never mind.

Number 10:  The never-ending Shanghai  Fashion Adventure!  As the saying here goes:  "Shanghai, where every day is Halloween!"  Want to wear glasses without lenses in them?  Sure!  No problem!   Wear pajamas in the street?  Go for it, but please watch the trap door.  Shanghai has a "Go For It Comrade Fashionista" approach like no other city in the world.

Yes, we are so outrageously far from....and another Delirium, please.

Number 9:   Shanghai is the best "Soft Landing" city in Asia for expats.  Yes, Shanghai is one of the largest Chinese cities and throws many a challenge at laowai, like the vendors who kill and pluck chickens in the street, but what the heck!   You can order a pizza or walk down the street and have a burger and fries.  There are delivery services to bring you everything you need, including groceries, alcohol, laundry and food from almost every restaurant in town, including Mikey D's.  Need something?  Pick up the phone and press "2" for English.

If you buy 10, you get them for $1.00 each.

Number 8:  The extremely favorable government-controlled exchange rate. You may not agree with China's exchange policy but it makes many items here very...reasonable.


Tall bottle of excellent Tsing Tao beer...60 cents.  Cab ride all the way across town...Two dollars.  Full massage, manicure and pedicure at a five-star spa...$80.00.   
Dinner for four with drinks at local Hunan restaurant...$50.00.  First release DVDs?  $1.50. Custom tailored shirts? $12.00.   Suits?  $100.00.  And, of course, guitars.  Stratocaster copy?  Case, strings, and guitar...$130!  Who doesn't need one of those?  Nooooo tipping!   Nooooo services charges, except the hidden ones.  All this means that the cost of living (excluding housing) is quite low here.


Number 7:   Fireworks 24/7.   Wedding?  Boom!  Store opening?  Boom boom!  Bad day at the office.  BOOM!  Buy a couple of bricks of crackers and light 'em up!  Perfectly legal.  And Chinese New Years?  Forget abouddddiiittt!!   Badda Boom!

Honey, don't forget to wear your mask today!

Number 6:  Shanghai living  prepares your immune system for future biological warfare or epidemics.

After a year of residence you will have the Navy Seals of intestinal flora doing pushups in your lower intestine.  Hut hut hut hut.  Bad food....laughable man.   Bring it ON!  Mess with the best, die like the rest, total pwnage.  Hand me another Sheng jian (fried bun, 生煎), darlin!

Bad air?  No problem.  Stuff a few cigarette filters up your nose and hit the streets. Or the very fashionable surgical mask can help you blend in on a particularly dusty day.

It's Shanghai Crayfish Season!

Reason 5:  Shanghai has over 70,000 reported restaurants.  If you add street vendors, noodle shops and the itinerant sweet potato roasters, you probably have over 200,000 places to get a meal.

Plus, Shanghai is becoming an international foodie haven with all major cuisines represented.  All eight of the Chinese regional cuisines are here, including fiery Sichuan and noodley Cantonese and Shanghai specialties. French/Japanese fusion bistros are next to high-end steak houses with Spanish tapas places in between.  It is a massive munchathon and Micky D's is open 24/7.

You must be.....American.

Reason 4:  The People!  Shanghai is the new "mixing bowl" of the world.  You will go hiking in the mountains with folks from Israel, the United Kingdom, Australia, Italy, Brazil, Ireland, and Canada on a trip organized by a Chinese and a Pakistani.  Your neighbors are  Japanese, Russian and Spanish and the French are everywhere in the the...French Concession.  All of this mixing has the backdrop of the 24-million strong population of our generally patient Chinese hosts from every province in the country.

Reason 3: Location, location, location.  When it all gets to be toooooooo much, Shanghai is an excellent jumping off point to the Other side of the World.  Take the overnight ferry from the docks in Shanghai to Kyoto.  Jump on a plane to Hong Kong, Tokyo, Seoul or Bangkok...they're only a few hours away. It is, after all, the Center of the World.  Just make sure you DON'T eat the sushi (despite Reason Number 6) on a Chinese airline.

Reason 2:  Ease of living.  Getting around the city is as simple as jumping on the world's largest metro system, with 20 lines to take you anywhere for 45 cents.   Need a cab?  As long as it is not raining, they are plentiful, clean and cheap.  A single card can be used to pay for taxi, bus, metro, ferries and the occasional soda.  And all in relative safety as the crime rates are extremely low here.

And the Number One Reason to Live in Shanghai:   The Markets!   Need a cricket cage?  Check out the bird and cricket markets. Need a hair dryer?  Go to the street of hair dresser supplies.  It's right next to the street of musical instruments and just west of the street of calligraphy supplies.  Need some bondage crabs?  The seafood markets have more live animals than your local aquarium.  Need a copy of anything or everything all at easily negotiated pirate prices?  Hit one of the major thieves markets.  Furniture?  Bring a picture and they will make it for you.  Next-generation Japanese or Korean cell-phone.  Let's go to the giant Cybermart.


So that wraps this up, Rock Stars!  Thanks for coming to the party and make sure you take a cab home!  See you next week.

Did You Remember Our Anniversary?

Hello.  Guess what???  Today is <in a high, squeaky voice> OUR ANNIVERSARY !  Yes, the Yellow River Chronicles has finished it's first year of daring travel reporting from This Side of the World, Shanghai, China.  To commemorate this event, we are republishing the first YRC, from June 15, 2011.  Oh, how the years fly by here in the 'Hai.  The YRC staff is headed out for the weekend (not to Paris, though) to do some research on Zhejiang Province south western China.  We'll have a special One Year After column next week!  In the meantime, check out the FIRST ever Yellow River Chronicles.

Here it is:

June 15, 2011

Greetings and welcome to Life on the Yellow River, my new stream of consciousness blog from The Other Side of the World, faire Shanghai, in the People's Republic of China.

You will be interested to know that the long-range plan for Shanghai is to become the "Paris of the East".  Not in the Old Colonial Days sense, but in the City of the Future sense.  If you doubt me, Google it.  Which leads me to a another thought.  Will "Google It"  become an insult in the future?  Will people say, "He's dumber than a Google Search?"  Perhaps. We may wish to meditate on that for a moment before we hurtle onward. Or not.

Jing'An Temple at Night

In case you didn't know, I currently reside in faire Shanghai in an area called Jing'An.  There is a mighty temple nearby that is part of a large shopping center, making it very convenient for shoppers and worshipers.  I promise a full report on Jing'An temple in the future because it is packed with history, adventure and commercial mojo.  How I, The Krez, descended upon Shanghai will be the subject of another blog called "Flight From The Midwest".  It recounts the tragic story of the Fall of the River House, the March Across the Plains and the Great Trip Backward.  Good stuff, that, but at another time.

In the meantime, the design for the Paris of the East can be seen (Yes!  It is not a secret!) in the highly interesting Shanghai Urban Planning Exhibition Center on People's Square, right across from famous Nanjing Lu and the Number One Department Store (you can see a theme emerging here.  There is a reason why the PRC is now the number one consumer of luxury goods in the world.) On the third floor of the SUPEC is an extremely large and detailed model of Shanghai 2020.  Here is a day and night photo, taken with a Nokia X3-O2 cellphone.

Shanghai 2020

Shanghai 2020 at night

Dazzling, yes?  Paris.....no.  However, there are a few things that would cause one compare Shanghai to Paris.

Why Shanghai is soooo like Paris:

1. There is a large and inexpensive Metro transport system.  However, the signage is much better in Shanghai.
2. Bikes for free! You can roll around both towns on the world's ugliest bike with a sign that proclaims you as a tourist and and an inept pawn.
3. A river runs through it.  Paris wins this one because the Huang Pu has an off-the-charts level of toxicity that melts flesh instantly off the bone.
4. Both cities have brightly lit and safe tourist shopping areas where everyone is cheated regardless of race or language.  Overall, Shanghai is an extremely safe city, where even the drunkest tourist is free to crawl down the sidewalk humming "Hotel California" as they exit from the KTV (more on this in another blog).
5. Killer architecture, everywhere.  Both cities have a broad and dazzling selection, but Paris seems to have quit innovating right after Napoleon hit the beach in St. Helena (the second time he was exiled, for you history buffs).  Shanghai is currently the architects playground, with new buildings with wild designs popping up like neon toadstools. True, both cities also have large stretches of soulless, concrete apartment blocks.
6. Food culture.  Paris has +8,000 restaurants, Shanghai has +50,000, according to various sources, so Paris wins based on R.P.C. (Restaurants Per Capita).   However, there is excellent food everywhere in both cities.  I would give Paris the edge for fine dining and Shanghai simply owns the street food segment.
7. Many inexpensive and clean taxis.  Score Shanghai.   You can cross town for $3.00 with an non-smoking and courteous driver in Shanghai.  The language barrier is about the same, but in Shanghai they have taxi cards!
8. Vibrant and growing culture.  Score, Paris.  This is Shanghai's largest issue.  Yogurt has a more active and living culture scene than the 'Hai. 
9. Five-star shopping.  Walk down Champs de Elysee and then walk down HuaiHai Lu and you will find....no difference, except HuaiHai has more trees... Serious.  There are Zegnas, Cartier, Tiffanys, Hermes, etc. on almost every block on the Hai.  Big shoppers, the Shanghaians.   I call it a tie, except all my French friends go NUTS when they shop in Shanghai.  You know who you are, mon amis.
10. Decadence!  Yep, they both have an ancient tradition of....well, late-night partying, we shall say.  During the Great Colonialization, the Europeans infected Shanghai with the decadence gene and it has florished here.  Very different cities during the day, but around 1:00 am.....

So that's the first post.   I will be posting a new one every Friday, so be sure to check back!

We Can Breathe Just Fine, Thank You.

This week's YRC will be a quick update to last week's wildly successful "Compare and/or Contrast" exercise on Dueling Air Quality Monitors in the good old PR of C.  As you may remember, we here at the YRC were thrilled to learn that the highly successful air monitoring program at the American Embassy in Beijing was coming to Shanghai.

Sir Elton John prepares for his Shanghai concert by breathing deeply

Yes folks, last year it was the Eagle's, this year Elton John and the good old American air monitoring are coming to Shanghai.  Or....maybe not.

However, while Sir Elton will be met with enthusiasm and excitement, he'd better not bring his candy-apple red, neon-lit Air Detector with him, NO SIR.

In the attached New York Times article, we learn that all foreign embassies are being asked to take their rooftop air monitors and put them where the air does not flow, so to speak.  Maybe a catchier headline would have have read, "China Asks Other Nations Not to Release Bad Air....Data".

This controversy clearly illustrates the YRC's Three Great Laws of Public Communications around the globe:

1)  Any information which is potentially negative or harmful is only negative or harmful if you actually release it to the public.  A problem is never a problem until someone admits that it is indeed a problem. 

2)  There is no set of facts, no matter how well-established and substantiated, that cannot be denied or challenged with another set of well-established and substantiated facts. 

3)  People can only remember three things.  This is the third.  Of the Three Things.  That we mentioned.  Before.  In this column.  Which you are currently reading.

We expect that next week the YRC will be covering the results of the PR of C air monitoring program in other nations around the world.  Or maybe....not.

In the meantime, here's the Times article:

China Asks Other Nations Not to Release Its Air Data

Andy Wong/Associated Press

A Beijing street shrouded by haze in January.

By KEITH BRADSHER

Published: June 5, 2012

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HONG KONG — After years of choking smog that stings the eyes and burns the lungs, regularly documented by an air sensor at the American Embassy in Beijing that posts the results hourly on Twitter, the Chinese government took a strong position on the issue on Tuesday.

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Wu Xiaoqing, the vice minister for environmental protection, demanded that foreign governments stop releasing data on China’s air.

In a criticism clearly aimed at the United States, Mr. Wu said at a news conference that the public release of air-quality data by foreign governments’ consulates “not only doesn’t abide by the spirits of the Vienna Convention on Diplomatic Relations and Vienna Convention on Consular Relations, but also violates relevant provisions of environmental protection.”

He complained that data from just a few locations were unrepresentative of broader air quality in China. He asserted that it was a mistake for a few consulates in China to be assigning labels like “hazardous” to China’s air based on standards that were drafted in industrialized countries and tightened over many years.

Such standards may not be appropriate for conditions in developing countries like China, Mr. Wu said, adding that “we hope the few consulates in China would respect our country’s relevant laws and regulations, and stop publishing this unrepresentative air-quality information.”

In case anyone missed the point, a Foreign Ministry spokesman, Liu Weimin, said at a briefing later in the day, “Of course, if the foreign embassies want to collect air-quality information for their own staff or diplomats, I think that is their own matter, but we believe that this type of information should not be released to the public.”

The American Embassy began tracking and releasing air-quality data in 2008, followed by its Guangzhou consulate last year and the Shanghai consulate last month.

Officials in China and Hong Kong have grudgingly responded by moving to release their own data on extremely fine particles measuring 2.5 micrometers or less in diameter, a size that penetrates particularly deep into lungs and has been linked to cancer and other respiratory problems. Public awareness in China of the health hazards associated with extremely fine particles has soared with the release of the American data, and particularly smoggy days now set off a surge in mentions of “PM2.5” on Weibo, a popular Chinese microblogging service similar to Twitter.

The criticism of the United States by Chinese officials comes after officials in Shanghai have recently taken exception to the public availability of data from the new monitor there. Richard L. Buangan, the American Embassy spokesman, wrote in an e-mail that the monitor “is a resource for the health of the consulate community, but is also available through our Twitter feed for American citizens who may find the data useful.”

He added, “We caution, however, that citywide analysis of air quality cannot be done using readings from a single machine.”

Mr. Buangan declined to comment on how the Vienna conventions might or might not have any legal bearing on the air monitors or the release of the data.

A version of this article appeared in print on June 6, 2012, on page A4 of the New York edition with the headline: China Asks Other Nations Not to Release Its Air Data.